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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23247403">CYBORGS HAVE FEELINGS TOO.</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/ratluvr/pseuds/ratluvr'>ratluvr</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Gorillaz</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Drug Use, Other, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Trans Characters</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-21</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 15:40:57</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,131</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23247403</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/ratluvr/pseuds/ratluvr</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>What happens to Cyborg Noodle?</p><p>Booting...<br/>Booting...<br/>Booting...<br/>FAILED</p><p>Booting...<br/>Booting...<br/>Booting<br/>SUCCESS</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Murdoc makes Cyborg Noodle to make him feel safe. His body guard, his protector. Makes him feel like he’s not lost his only daughter… He grieves like this. And, well. Cyborg Noodle is a helluva shot. Comes in handy in case you’re being chased by pirates.</p><p>As soon as Noodle came back, Cyborg wasn’t needed anymore. She’s at the bottom of the ocean, anywho. She makes her way back to what’s left of the deteriorating floating paradise She serves no purpose besides keeping everyone safe, and she can’t do that anymore. She’s lost, where is everyone? All she can see is red. You can say robots, cyborgs, don’t have emotions. She proves your theory wrong.</p><p> </p><p>All she can feel is bitterness. Left on a fucking floating hunk of garbage. ”Yeah, I ‘mean so much to you,’ Murdoc. Is this what happened when you left Noodle? The sole reason I had to be created in the first place, because <i>YOU</i> fucked up? <i>YOU fucked up.”</i> She says to herself, alone, on the beach. She kicks things, a starting of a bad habit for when she lost her temper. Seems she’s quite similar to someone else we know with an explosive temper. Sometimes she would shoot at a bird to scare it off, not killing it though. She was a cyborg but she was ‘humane,’ at least.</p><p> </p><p>“Proceed with your fame--I’m forgotten. If you cared about me, <i>where is that now?”</i> Seven years of built up hatred. If she could contact Noodle to ask how they were, how she could come back, she would. Though they’ve never spoken, she thought it would be nice to be level with someone the exact same as her. <i>‘Surely Noodle would understand,’</i> She thinks. 01110100 01101000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01101000 01100101 01101100 01101100 00101110</p><p> </p><p>This place was once ‘home.’ Not anymore, not even for her. There was too much hatred for the place! Though, she couldn’t leave, she’s been putting together an air ship for 4 months straight. Good thing she didn’t need to eat, drink, or sleep, because there wasn’t anything on this blasted island anyway. All these years... she’s spent in a hardware coma. She woke up, a few months ago, scrounged around for airship parts. Awoken by, presumably a rock hitting her head, a few bird shits, etc. Who <i>really</i> knows?</p><p> </p><p>“He’s far from fucking ‘paradise.’” She says, spitting the oil from her mouth everywhere, like venom. The statement has two meanings--literal and emotional. The road to paradise begins in Hell, and Murdoc has yet to find it. He’s still on his journey there. He sure has gotten close, in a literal sense, but so far away emotionally. Much better than where he started, but “He’s still fucked up enough to leave me on this plastic playboy mansion.” She interrupts her own thoughts.</p><p>“I’m not the type people can fuck with and get away with it. And I’m not like Noodle, a little girl walking in her dad’s footsteps. I’ll show you not to fuck with me.” She says. You can hear her bashing shit, clank, bop. The Aircraft is being completed, the finishing touches coming into place. She’s getting off of this rotting Hell, finally! “You made me in your image, old man, so now you’ll have to deal with the consequences of that. A tempermental freak of a child.” She hasn’t aged for 7 years, so she’s still quite immature and childish.</p><p>Deep down she does know they didn’t mean to leave her behind… They may have even looked for her at the bottom of the ocean, but she’ll never know. Maybe she was hated, but she definitely knew she was forgotten. Yet, they hadn’t seen the last of her. “Might as well have dumped me in the ocean anyway.” She says, though it would have taken her drive YEARS to repair itself. Which, didn’t matter in the long run, but it was just a thought after all.</p><p> </p><p>Noodle was like Murdoc, his daughter basically. They’re very alike. But, Cyborg… was even MORE like him. Literally made in his self image. The small red cross hung on her neck, the only black clothing, her mannerisms, doubts, temper—all part of her programming. She ponders often why he would make her like this when there was always a chance of her turning against him. “Because I was also programmed to protect him.” She frowns, remembering that key fact. It’s something she mulls over. She’s been trying to override access to the Harm Murdoc’ files, but it just isn’t working. Perhaps this is how human’z brains process things when they’re going through with a decision. A human wouldn’t be able to kill someone else without being seriously fucked up, mentally or emotionally heightened (take this line out)</p><p>Well, Cyborg was so similar to him. She knows it, and Murdoc does too. Soon he’ll realize that’s not such a good thing. Actions to have consequences, after all.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. PROGRESS...</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>hi ive had this sitting in my google docs literally right after i published the first one. i just didnt publish it. regardless, i hope you enjoy!</p><p>i revised it a little and am going to try and work it out for another chapter. threaten me on tumblr to continue it: t-revor ❤️</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>They hear a knock on the door, no one was expecting any company. They all knew this because they all stared at the door, unmoving. </p><p>“Is anybody gonna get that?” Russel motions to the door.</p><p>No one says anything. </p><p>“Augh, fine.” Murdoc sighs, stands up and stretches. “I’ll get it.” He grumbles. Muttering something like, ’I'm the only one who does anything around here.’ under his breath.</p><p>2D jumps back to life and opens the door before Murdoc can even finish stretching.</p><p>“Well.” He sits back down and continues reading his book.</p><p> </p><p>2D opens up the door, and it’s… Noodle? But she was sitting on the cou- He looked back. No, she must have gone to the bathroom or something. But this isn’t ‘Noodle’... Something is definitely off about her. “Step aside,” She mutters as she pushes 2D out of the way to get to Murdoc. She’s mad at all of them but she’s mad at Murdoc the most. He is knocked into the door and rubs his arm to ease the shove, closing the door. </p><p>Murdoc doesn’t put his book down, because he doesn’t care of the shenanigans that 2D and Noodle are getting into this time. It doesn’t concern him, barely ever. Though this time it did, more than he could ever comprehend, unless he just looked up…<br/>
...<br/>
...<br/>
...<br/>
DONK. Something hard and metal hits him right on the top of his head.</p><p>“Owww, ow, what the bloody Hell-“ He mutters as he looks up, and realizes he’s in big trouble. “Oh.” He says feebly, just staring, pale-faced, not knowing what to do, to think, say, feel, any of it. He’s stunted, there can’t possibly be a moment after this. Time isn’t moving at all. Cyborg can tell his expression has changed; being around him a lot in the past, she can read him well. Though, she’s never seen this look, relating to her at least. Maybe she can finally understand it. Dread, and guilt envelops him.</p><p>“How could you leave me.” She says, a little too quietly for how angry she is. She turns around and faces every one in the group, as Noodle is walking in from the bathroom. She just stands there blank faced, hard to read, but it’s a look of shock, surprise. Cyborg has MORE than gotten everyone’s attention now. “HOW COULD YOU LEAVE ME...” She says, flatly, but you can tell she’s angry as hell. There’s oil, some dried, some seeping off of her face. She’s shaking out of anger, which you wouldn’t think a cyborg could even do. It’s in her programming to be dramatic, when she wasn’t used for other’s protection. That much she’s overridden, so far. </p><p>“Oh, no...” Noodle mutters. </p><p>Everyone in the room knows that they didn’t forget about Cyborg. They tried to deal with it. They tried to find her, to put her at ease, at least, but apparently it had made everything much worse. Or so, they thought. There’s no way of actually knowing. Noodle approaches her carefully, as you would a deer that’s daring to interact with the one human it’s ever laid its eyes on.</p><p> “Hey. It’s okay.” She takes her hand in her own, they had never talked, but they had a sisterly bond whether they knew it or not. Noodle had always wanted a sister. “Come here, I’ll help you.” Noodle smiles at Cyb and she thinks that she can trust her, either way she’s dragged to Noodle’s room to calm down. “You know you’ve got to have an actual plan for this confrontation, it’s not good to cause a scene like that when you’re trying to convey your ‘emotions.’” Noodle pulls out a few papers from her desk and shows them to Cyb. “Well, I know you might not care for this much but it’s REALLY IMPORTANT!!” She points at the papers urgently while holding them so the other can see the title. Conflict Resolution. Cyb grabs them and reads them, still looking shaken up and mad, but willing to listen to a possible solution for this whole mess.</p><p>“I got these from my therapist,” Noodle explained. <i>‘Maybe it will make her more inclined to know more about this and what they can do to tackle it the right way.’</i> “They’re a few years old but I still use them, and it helps a LOT when we’re arguing…” </p><p>Cyborg hasn’t talked to anyone in 7 odd years. For most of 6 years she’s been in lockdown from her harddrive trying to find an ounce of something to boot for. The rest has been lonely, and frankly she didn’t know how to talk before, anyway. She learned from Murdoc, and he says some crazy shit sometimes so there’s some serious work that needed to be done and they both knew it. Cyb knew that Noodle was on her side. Because, well, she had to be. With how fucked up Cyb has been, Noodle was the only one that could truly help her.</p><p> </p><p>Meanwhile, Murdoc and everyone in the living room is currently freaking out. Russel is kind of mad--not at anyone--just at the situation. He wonders how it’s gotten to this level, though he reassures everyone that Noodle will help her take a step in the right direction. Stu is… comforting both of them, as he doesn’t have much guilt associated with Cyborg anymore. He’s worked through it in the last 7 years, and he’s been trying to get everyone else to follow in his steps. Russel agreed that they could cope together, but..</p><p>Well--Murdoc… He’s stubborn as Hell, so there’s no way he’d be that vulnerable with an audience. He’s been vulnerable with Stu before, but a third or fourth person... (Russ and Noodle) Let’s just say he wasn’t so enthused about the idea. “I can take care of myself,” He says, slurring, pouring himself another shot. Murdoc thought that drinking away his problems was considered coping. In what world? He didn't know, and no one else knew, but he pretended he knew. He was just beginning to understand proper coping, the last few years--as he’s definitely gotten better and less of an arsehole, to himself AND his bandmates. <i>’Then all of this shit happens,’</i> He thinks, setting down the now empty shot glass, and sighing, setting his face into his hands. </p><p> </p><p>Russ and Stu had sat next to him after the Noodles left, patting and rubbing his back. “We’re here for you, man. I know you may not want to talk but it’s necessary in the road to recovery--coming to terms with your feelings and the mistakes you’ve made. The turmoil you’ve built around the faults can be addressed.” Russ looked over at Murdoc who has his head buried. He can tell Stu nodded in agreement, because the couch moved slightly as he did so. “Yeah, we’re here to help you, Murdoc.” Stu says.</p><p>Murdoc is way too shaken up to even begin to create a response to them so he just rubs his head, feeling a small knot forming where Cyborg had hit him on his noggin. “Bloody hell,” He mutters. “I need some ice.” Avoidant as always, he gets up as he’s still a little shying away from others touches, though they had been comforting. He grabs an ice pack from the freezer and looks at them both on the couch. He didn’t even have to say anything for them to know that his look meant to scoot over. He nods one of appreciation that they understood his boundaries. (It’s something they’ve been working on, building trust in touching as well as boundaries surrounding them.) They left a comfortable amount of room for him to sit without being touched by them, though, still close. He groans as he sits back down on the couch, anything but upright.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>already working on next chapter, let me know what you think of this! feel free to comment any constructive criticize, as this is only the 2nd fic ive posted online! I'd really appreciate it!! also if you notice any typos of grammar mistakes feel free to let me know! &lt;3</p></blockquote></div></div>
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